Domestic violence has plagued our society for years. There are many abusive relationships and the only question to ask is: why? The main answer is control. The controlling characteristic that males attribute to their masculinity is the cause of these abusive relationships. When males are not in control they feel that their masculinity is threatened and they need to do something about it. This doesn't just occur in their relationships, but rather in every aspect of life. Men are constantly fighting for power and control, whether at work, at home, during sports or in a relationship, this remains true. So the only way to get this power is for them to be “men”; tough, strong, masculine, those who ask for and take power. Where does this thirst for control come from? Is it the natural structure of man or is it a social construction? The answer is that it is the social construction of patriarchy that causes this fear-based thirst for control. Fear is emasculated, whether it is homosexuality or femininity. Men use the fear created by domestic violence to gain control, but yet women have some control in a relationship – it is this vague boundary of how much control leads to domestic violence. Control means dominating something or someone. The reason people want control is because control is power. Masculinity is always associated with power and control, while femininity is associated with passivity and weakness. As Allan Johnson states, this is related to the fact that “male dominance creates power differences between men and women” (248). So, because men are in positions of power, they seem more superior to women, creating these stereotypes about each gender. The reason this is important… middle of the paper… even though domestic violence is frowned upon by men, he uses it to instill fear in a woman. It's a strange concept, but largely in part as domestic violence is carried out, as I stated before. Violence is how men gain control and use it in many different areas. They are caught in a vicious circle, as Johnson said. Men fear being controlled and assert that control by using violence to create fear. When men feel emasculated, which often happens in relationships, things get worse. The most interesting part of this whole thing is that relationships should be a place where each other connects. They should be vulnerable towards each other, but many men are still unable to do this. This shows that the idea of ​​being more masculine is deeply rooted and is almost like an illness whose symptom can become domestic violence.