Topic > The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Discussion

In the video, 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work, many ideas were shared about happy marriages and the research surrounding them. The seven principles include: 1) improve your love maps, 2) cultivate your affection and admiration, 3) turn towards each other, 4) let your partner influence you, 5) resolve your solvable problems, 6) break the deadlock, 7) create shared meaning. The first principle states that it is important to know what your partner likes, as well as his hopes and aspirations. The second is probably the most important principle. Showing appreciation is a simple way to cultivate affection and admiration. The third principle means that happy couples show attention to each other and engage in small acts of connection, such as a phone call during the day. The fourth, letting your partner influence you, shows that for a marriage to work, the couple must work as a team and make decisions together. It's important to listen to your partner's point of view and really listen to it. The fifth principle is quite explicit. It simply means that partners need to actually work on their little problems instead of avoiding them. Overcoming the stalemate, as the sixth principle states, means accepting and adapting perpetual problems. These problems are major personality differences that are unlikely to be resolved. The advice given is to accept and adapt, as well as respect your partner's dreams and beliefs. The last principle, creating shared meaning, explains the importance of creating rituals of connection and working towards a common goal. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an Original Essay Many of the principles described in the video are also used in Com 102, Interpersonal Communications. For example, we discussed that love requires maintenance. The concept of relationship maintenance is similar to the principles for making a marriage work. The second principle, cultivate your affection and admiration, applies directly to relationship maintenance strategies. Relationship maintenance strategies include positivity, assurance, sharing tasks, acceptance, self-disclosure, relationship talk, and social networking. In the video under the second principle, this concept was demonstrated. The positivity has been one of the biggest things. If couples had a positive view of his/her past, they were more likely to have a happy marriage and a good future. Reassurances were also shown in the video to show appreciation for your partner's good characteristics. All of these principles, in the video and lesson, can be used to improve my life. Now I know the strategies I can and should use to have a great relationship. Just watching this video has opened my mind in such a way that I now have a better perspective on what it means to be in a relationship. Above all, marriage is not easy and requires work. John M. Gottman has truly touched my heart and mind with his wisdom.