On Saturday morning, as I was gathering my thoughts to write another paper for my International Relations (IR) class, I felt ambivalent, wary, and hesitant. Surprisingly, for a brief moment, I was overwhelmed by the feeling of empowerment. As I consciously began to dig the surface of my discomfort, I ran into fear. Fear of rejection, of failure, of not limiting oneself to imperial (Western) standards of academic writing and scholarship. Standards and practices that have been taught, or should I say imposed, on me for many years. This fear resides permanently in the collective memory of the “Other”, the backward, the illiterate, the savage, the barbarian, the non-Western and the non-modern. This is the fear that Kumarakulasingam felt every day at school, the fear of an “imminent assault” if we dare to go against the “norms” (Inayatullah, 2011; 34). What's worse, this fear is not simply confined to the realm of knowledge; it actively encompasses and shapes our individual and collective lives, our imaginations, our bodies, our histories, our borders, our modern state and its infrastructure, our culture, and even our civilizations. As I reread the newspaper tip, I felt a cool, refreshing breeze on my face and a rush of adrenaline through my veins. A breeze that only a prisoner can feel when he leaves the dense and high prison walls for the first time. A rush of blood that heralds the beginning of a new life. A new life for oneself and for others. The idea of ​​writing “alternative IR” freed me – for a brief moment – ​​from the constraints of “standard” norms and practices. I wish to use this brief moment of freedom to “write” a response that demonstrates a methodological, ontological, and epistemological approach to… middle of paper… and justice,” anticolonial IR,” and the “politics of postcolonial engagement ” implies a perpetual struggle against the Western imperial project on every front, against the production of knowledge, against the creation of identities, against globalization and against global injustice. open our eyes and realize that we are far from our project. We are still confined to Western modes of knowledge production and practices. Despite my best efforts to free myself from imperial standards and norms, I end up writing a Western-style piece. Perhaps because I have no concrete alternatives to look at and take inspiration from. What we need are our own ways of producing knowledge, identities, standards and practices that are more humane, sensitive and relevant to us. Works Cited Inyatullah, N. Post colonial IR.